Tips for Mother's Day
Mother’s Day is quickly approaching – let the handmade cards and breakfast-in-bed rituals begin! Moms play a very important role in the lives of children, there is no disputing that. However there is also deep brokenness that our kids feel. They may not be able to name it- but they feel it. It’s important that we show our kids that we respect there mothers. I have found when appropriate making them a card, sending flowers, and a photo book of memeiores have made a big emapct. I always emphasize with the mother of my children. I understand the brokenness of that day for her. I know she did not set out to be in this situation and so I pray for her heart- and mine. The beauty and brokenness of Mothers Day for a child in foster care.
I wanted to share some helpful advice from info@coalitionforcyf.org
In order to help you prepare, we wanted to share some suggestions for how you can help the child or children in your care cope with the upcoming holiday:
Simply be aware of how difficult this day may be for the child in your care. Do your best to prepare yourself and other family members for possible emotional “meltdowns” or other chaos.
Do some pre-Mother’s Day prep by talking about the upcoming day with the child in your care. Depending on how the conversation goes, your family may decide to “lay low” for the day, and engage in some alternative activities.
Understand that Mother’s Day, for your family, may not look the way it does for other families. Emotions may run high, so you might plan some low energy, at-home time. Activities that positively engage children’s minds and bodies, like yoga, mindfulness exercises, or Theraplay, may be just what your family needs to celebrate the day your way.
In addition to those tips, you might also plan some time for you and the child in your care to think about how he or she can honor his or her birth mother, such as:
If appropriate, help to set up a visit for the child and his or her birth mother. Your case manager and the child’s worker may have some input about how to manage the visit and make it go as well as possible.
If a visit isn’t possible, perhaps you could set up a phone call or social media connect for the child and his or her birth mother.
Very often, children have time in school to make cards or gifts for their moms. Perhaps the child’s school went the extra mile and the child in your home has a handmade card or potted flower for both moms (birth and foster) in his or her life; if so, how wonderful! If not, and the child has brought home a card or gift for you, first, remember to embrace and enjoy the moment! Then, claim the opportunity to show the child that you value and respect his or her birth family. Get out the finger paints and construction paper, or a clay pot, potting soil, and a flower and help this child create a Mother’s Day gift for his or her birth mother, as well. (Even if the child can’t give the gift to his or her mother on Mother’s Day, you can save it for the next time the pair have a visit.)
Perhaps most importantly, rely on your wonderful empathy – it’s something that has always been in your skill set”.
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However you celebrate or acknowledge the day, all of us at Foster Love Ministries honor all mothers – birth mothers, foster mothers, and adoptive mothers